LOYAL TO A FAULT: Mary Kate Abner on What it Means to be a Girl Failure, Imperfect Women on Screen, and Trying Hard by Diana Rendon

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 28TH, 2026 - MK and Diana’s Couch in their Greenpoint Apartment

DIANA RENDON: Do I say hello? Is that what I do? 

MARY KATE ABNER: Hello, Diana. 

DIANA: Hello, Mary Kate!

MK: Yay!!!

DIANA: I’m sitting here with Mary Kate Abner, who is my best friend, best collaborator, sister, roommate, soulmate, and all of the above. 

Little background for you. I’ve known MK since the first day of my freshman year of college. She had just transferred into the drama program, so it was her first day there as well. At orientation, we’d been split up into random groups, and we were going around the circle sharing our names and what cohort we were in. When I said I was in ‘Blue Group’, MK GASPED, put her arm around me, and said: “Oh my God, me too, TWINS!” 

MK: DID I REALLY? 

DIANA: I remember thinking in that moment, this is going to be my best friend. Mind you, a week later, I saw you in class and said, “Mary Kate!” and you told me you didn’t remember my name. 

MK: [Laughs.] Stop. I love you so much.

DIANA: I love you. Anyway, I’m here today with Mary Kate to talk about her artistic life and all things Girl Failure, which is a web series Mary Kate created and is completely out now. We shot it in September/October, and we’ve been releasing it over the course of this month. It’s a story about a fictionalized Mary Kate, who went through a really shitty breakup in 2024. She took all of those feelings and put it into this show. She let me be in it, let me play myself, which was so awesome. It was so much fun to make, I’m so grateful I was part of it. And so excited to be talking about it with you today. 

MK: Me too!

DIANA: So, starting off hot: What does the term ‘Girl Failure’ mean to you? 

MK: Generally, ‘girl failure’ is associated in pop culture with female characters that are super flawed. For example, like Fleabag from Fleabag. 

DIANA: Ugh, YES!

MK: We LOVE her. My favorite girl failure. But also, to me, it’s come to mean someone who is trying really hard to aspire to something. Either in their career, their relationships, their ambitions– and they fail every time because often they’re the only person holding themselves back. Like– OH! Another great example is Shiv Roy from Succession. 

DIANA: YES! SHIV ROY! Who Mary Kate was a stand-in for in season 4, by the way. 

MK: C’mon plug. 

Fleabag, Shiv Roy, or more recently, Maia from I Love LA, or any archetype of woman that seems to fail over and over again but most importantly, still gets back up every time and keeps going. ….#Perseverance? 

DIANA: #We’reAllGirlFailures

MK: #SepiaFilter

DIANA: We talked a bit about this in the intro, but what inspired you to make this show?

MK: Long story short. A few years ago, I went through this breakup with this guy.

DIANA: He sucked. I hate him. 

MK: Yeah, my friends were SUPER excited that he broke up with me. 

DIANA: [Laughs.] Oh my GOD, I wouldn’t say THAT!

MK: Okay, I want to be as kind to him as possible. It was an important relationship. It was my first serious relationship, and he was someone who I really loved. He was very important to my growth and development and I truly do wish him the best. But during our breakup, he said some really unforgivable things to me. One of them was that I was unlovable. It was one of those things that someone says to you that completely shakes how you view yourself. It was something that stuck with me for a very long time and I was just like– “how could anyone say something like that?” 

DIANA: It is a horrible thing to say to somebody. It’s like, even if you are terrible enough to think something like that, don’t say it out loud!

MK: Of course, when he said that, I then was like, “Okay, all bets are off. I’m gonna say some really unforgivable things too.” We’re all flawed. For months after, I journaled about what it means to be lovable. I journaled about the people I’m surrounded by and my community because if I still have these amazing people around me, then surely I’m not completely unlovable. Being shown love from my roommates, my friends, and my longtime childhood best friends in that time when I feel like I was probably being insufferable meant a lot. They were still choosing to show up for me and choosing to love me. 

DIANA: Of course.

MK: That’s more impactful to me than any romantic relationship I’ve ever had. Friends are really at the core of who I am and what Girl Failure is about. So I started writing about it. I wrote a bunch of different stories. I wrote a feature, which turned into a pilot, which turned into Diana and I talking about making a very grand webseries, which turned into me making a practically sized webseries with other friends like Olivia Adele Steinberg, who I brought on to direct. And that brought us here. It was all just a ton of writing and thinking about the people I have around me and how I came to the conclusion of self-love. 

DIANA: That’s really beautiful. Perfectly takes me to my next question which is what was your biggest takeaway from making a series based on true events? How has it changed you as a human and artist? 

MK: My biggest lesson, I think, is to truly not care what other people think. Firstly, it is obviously really humiliating but kind of exciting to think about how multiple exes of mine are going to see this show. It’s informed by multiple ex-relationships and situationships and stuff combined. It’s awesome to hope that they or their cousins or childhood best friends or whatever will see this and that’s cathartic in a way. But also, it’s so important is to truly not give a fuck if people are thinking about you. Obviously, we live together so we talk about this all the time but I feel like people are so afraid to be seen trying. Or to make something that might seem stupid or silly or imperfect. 

DIANA: I think people often forget that that’s such a huge part of life, being an artist, and working in the entertainment industry. It’s putting yourself out there and trying. It’s sad that we’ve been conditioned to feel like we have to be small and not be seen, not feel brave enough to put ourselves out there. 

MK: Like, is it humiliating to post about my webseries on my instagram story with a rainbow font and be like “you guys should watch this!”? 

MK/DIANA: YES!

DIANA: Obviously!

MK: It’s actually embarrassing but it’s so beautiful! Because I don’t care! The people that are watching us post might think it’s stupid. But, like, okay? I’m trying! I’m having fun and trying. 

DIANA: We’re all just trying our best!

MK: That is allowed and that is okay. Something I get frustrated about often is the fact that there are so many amazing pieces of film or theatre or anything that will never even see the light of day because people are terrified to put themselves out there. But the only way to get better is to make something! And even if it’s bad, it doesn’t matter, because at least you made something. I know that sounds annoying but like yes, the journey actually IS more valuable than the product. 

DIANA: Absolutely. Okay, so, when you first came to me about this project, it obviously felt so on brand for you. But I’m so curious to hear about what I like to call people’s “canons”– what is involved in the Mary Kate Canon? If somebody slides a project across your desk, what is the criteria for an immediate yes from you? What kind of stories do you gravitate towards? 

MK: I don’t care if this is basic: I love to work on female stories. 

DIANA: Not basic. Incredible. 

MK: There are not enough stories about women that are flawed and imperfect. It is so important to see imperfect women on screen. We need more messy female stories. 

DIANA: We allow male characters to be messy all the time and it’s unfair. 

MK: IT’S SO UNFAIR! Take Marty Supreme, for example. Marty is objectively kind of an evil person but everyone is like “Yasss, I’m gonna have my Marty Supreme year!” Like, if that was MARTHA Supreme, no one would care! BECAUSE SHE’S A WOMAN! [Laughs.]

DIANA: [Laughs.] OH MY GOD YOU’RE SO RIGHT. 

MK: It’s so crazy. Listen. If you hand me a script that has a woman that is messy and chaotic, I love it. I’ve played a lot of mean, hot-headed lesbians. Those are the characters I play and I love it, I wouldn’t change it for the world. 

DIANA: Ugh. I love that answer. Long live Martha Supreme. Yes! Okay, so you and I are super passionate about the art we love. I always like to say you can get to know me better by watching my favorite movies. Is there a film or show you identify with and you believe should be “Mary Kate Required Reading” before someone meets you or works with you? 

MK: Okay, honestly, my favorite movies are Narnia and Star Wars. 

DIANA: Hell yeah!

MK: It’s because they’re about family, friendship, and finding yourself through the people you surround yourself with. 

DIANA: Yeah! It seems like that is something that is of the utmost importance to you. Community above all. 

MK: Exactly. So, I’d say movie wise it’s The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe and Star Wars: Episode VI. And then TV wise, it’s Abbott Elementary and Adults. At their core, all of these stories are about unlikely family and friendship that focus on these characters finding their true purpose in life through the fostering of their community. And that’s the only reason I do anything: it’s all because of the people I have around me. I love the people in my life.

One of my exes once said to me that my worst quality is that I’m “loyal to a fault.” And it’s totally true! I’m a Scorpio, and I’m super loyal to a fault. It’s because I fight really hard for the people around me and they do the same for me. I wouldn’t be where I am today without those people. 

DIANA: For sure. “Loyal to a fault” is a great title. Okay, so we’re doing this interview on February 28th and as of this morning, all four episodes of the webseries are out. We’re very excited. The finale was a writing debut for you! How has writing your own material been a different experience for you as an actor, and are you hoping to continue writing? 

MK: Definitely yes to continuing writing. I have so many ideas. As for writing as an actor, it was interesting to know that I was going to be playing “Mary Kate”. It was cool to know that I’d be writing for you. It was so much fun. And as an actor, you’re so in tune with relationships on the page so it felt like dialogue that felt truthful and natural came easier. And it was really fun to write a theatre scene. I knew all of my theatre girlies would get it. 

DIANA: Shoutout Playwrights Horizons!

MK: YES! Shoutout Playwrights! That’s where we met! That’s where we were born. Anyway, yeah, it was so fun to write about a theatre rehearsal. We’re all theatre kids at heart. And I love Theater Camp, which I feel like was also a huge inspiration for the episode. I love Molly Gordon, Ben Platt, Owen Thiele, Ayo Edebiri… The best. 

DIANA: We’re obsessed.

MK: And it was so much fun to cast one of our day-one friends, Kobi Masselli, to play the director because also as a theatre person, he understood the vibe immediately. Overbearing directors are a universal experience.

DIANA: Absolutely. Shoutout Kobi. We love you. Okay, what do you hope is people’s main takeaway from Girl Failure? 

MK:  Okay. So I hope people watch the last episode and listen to ‘Don’t Go Back to His Ass’ by Audrey Hobert. 

DIANA: YES!

MK: And okay. This is a piece of art that I feel like I had to put out as soon as possible. In my mid-20s, I feel like I’m in a really transient time in my life where a lot of things are changing. The things we made six months ago don’t even really apply to how I feel right now.

DIANA: Wow. That’s so true. In your 20s, it feels like your whole world changes every week. 

MK: The four episodes that are based on my life, active events that were happening in my life at the time of shooting, are no longer accurate to how I feel about myself anymore. It’s kind of beautiful to see that growth and have hope for myself. I hope people leave it feeling hopeful. Obviously, it’s our tagline, but this is a series that truly reflects the fact that we’ve all been there. We’ve all been through a bad breakup that ruins you as a person and makes you lose your mind. 

DIANA: Every single person has gone through it. Even if it wasn’t a breakup, it’s a friend breakup.

MK: Or a situationship. 

DIANA: It all goes back to the definition of the “girl failure.” We’ve all tried so hard to be the best friend and partner we possibly can. We try to do good. It’s unfortunate to be in a situation with a person who maybe just isn’t right for you. But it’s so relatable. We all know what it’s like to be in a relationship with someone, romantic or platonic, and maybe have a falling out or get seriously hurt by that person and it seemingly redefines you as a human being. Because you lost someone that you really loved and mattered a lot to you. 

MK: Exactly. I think perhaps people will walk away seeing themselves in Mary Kate’s character but also wishing better for her. That’s what I took away. I understand why she was feeling this way and I love her and her roommates and everything, but I hope she can find more self love. More than she does in the last episode. Spoiler alert. 

DIANA: It’s a uniquely strange and beautiful thing to write a character that’s an extension of yourself. We obsess over our favorite fictional characters and are so empathetic toward them. We should apply that same amount of grace to ourselves. It feels so much easier to be so mean to ourselves and excuse so much of the actions of our favorite characters. 

MK: Was that your experience? 

DIANA: I could cry talking about it. I obviously love you so much. Oh wow, okay, WOW, I’m gonna cry. [Starts tearing up.]

MK: Diana. Stop. I’m gonna cry.

DIANA: There’s something about watching a fictionalized version of your best friend based on real events in her life and watching her go through hardships but still get up and try over and over again. I experience being your friend and watching you live in my home with me but then I watch “Mary Kate” on screen and I just have such a soft spot for her. It’s comparable only to how we feel about fictional characters. It’s cool because we always say things like “I wish I was in the Sex and the City friend group!”, “I wish Anton and Paul Baker from Adults were real!” But my favorite character on my favorite show is my best friend in real life. 

MK: [Starts crying.] Okay. Stop. Diana! I love you so much. 

DIANA: Wow I can’t believe we’re crying. I love you so much. 

[They start crying and laughing and say more very sappy things to each other off the record.]

DIANA: Alright. Let’s wrap this up. What’s next for Girl Failure? 

MK: Stick around and find out. Many secret plans. Filled to the brim with secrets. 

DIANA: That’s why her hair’s so big!

MK: We would like to do some fun things with these characters in the future. There will be many more breakups and there will always be Diana. [Laughs.] There will be more content to write. You know what I mean.

DIANA: [Laughs.] I don’t think I do. 

MK: There will always be more stories to write about. I will always have my best friend and roommate Diana; we’ll go through many more adventures together to write about. 

DIANA: Oh, of course. Thank you, Mary Kate. 

MK: Thank YOU, Diana! I love you. And our matching shirts!

DIANA: Our matching shirts we’re wearing! 

MK: We’re the most annoying girls I’ve ever met.

DIANA: And we love it. Do you love it? 

MK: We hope you do. 

DIANA: Watch Girl Failure, it’s streaming on YouTube now! All four episodes are out. Look up ‘Girl Failure Show’ on YouTube, TikTok, Instagram, anywhere and watch and we hope you’ll join us in our girl failure-ism. 

MK: We love you, girl failures.